Luca’s Birth Story

Hearing hundred’s of birth stories before mine inspired me so much before my own pregnancy,

so I hope my story can help inspire women to birth on their own terms too.

My waters (partially) broke 5 days before Luca was born. It was late on the evening of Sat January 17th when I had a rush of emotion and tears, being hit with the reality that it was the end of the chapter of River & I alone—and before I could even communicate the thoughts to him, my water broke. Funnily enough, our midwife had dropped off the birth pool that day (at 38 weeks + 2) and suggested we blow it up to make sure it held air, and then deflate it until birth started. He had inflated it that afternoon and we looked over at it and had a laugh that we wouldn’t be needing to deflate it after all.

I hadn’t really had any contractions leading up to that, and still nothing that night or the next day at all. The next day (Sunday 18th) I went to the grocery store and started prepping nourishing food and snacks to have in the fridge for immediate PP, knowing it could happen anytime now. I still had client calls for the next day and technically booked as well for the next 10 days, as I was bracing myself for the common 42+ week first pregnancy.

My waters were leaking consistently from that Saturday evening when they first broke, and very mild and very infrequent contractions started by Sunday evening. I took a couple client calls the following day (Monday), and when I did curb walking outside in between calls, I noticed the intensity and frequency of contractions increased. They were still very mild, but I decided to call it on all the rest of my booked calls moving forward so I could really drop into the birth portal.

By dinner time on that Monday evening, contractions were picking up in intensity and were about 4–5 mins apart consistently. That night I didn’t sleep much but was still able to get rest in between the contractions that lasted like that all night. The next day it was full-on from morning time; I didn’t leave the bedroom at all from then on until she was born. Our bedroom was our intended birth cocoon—with our king bed, a full-size futon on the ground, the birth pool, and our bathroom that has a shower.

River made us breakfast but I was only interested in taking a few bites. From then onwards he was just constantly bringing me cold coconut water or water loaded with electrolytes. Much later in birth when I was super exhausted I also had some manuka honey. 

From that Tuesday morning until Luca was born (the following morning), the intense contractions stayed consistent, oftentimes a minute apart for hours at a time. It was so intense while contracting, but I was able to deeply soften during the breaks and experience real peace and relaxation in between surges. During the surges I would often lean on our stair railing or the ground and get real primal with my sounds.

We had been checking in with our midwife from the time my water broke on Saturday, but she actually joined us on Tuesday early evening when things had ramped up all day. By then I’d been in/out of the pool a few times but only stayed in briefly as it was slowing things down.

By the time our midwife arrived, I had been in pretty intense labour for over 20 hours we were definitely a tad confused because it seemed like things weren’t progressing despite serious intensity for so many hours. I started doing the miles circuit to support baby being in the right position (going up and down stairs sideways, hips elevated, etc) having to stop every minute or so for a big contraction—hours went by, still just consistent intense contractions but seemingly no shift in baby dropping down. There were also a few different moments that happened that commonly signal transition (like throwing up), nonetheless the contractions were really still so high up and it consistently felt very far from actually meeting her.

As I was getting progressively more exhausted, River reached out to our Jedi kinesiologist over in Australia to investigate a little bit, to see if we could do anything to help her move down. He said oxytocin was low and cortisol was high (not surprising because I’d been having intense contractions now for over 24 hours). He was also curious if I was dilated at all, so our midwife checked and I was around 4 cm, which was slightly disheartening since I was in such active labor for so long (in hindsight I probably shouldn’t have heard that information to protect my peace and just passed it along directly to Rob.. but since we were checking anyways I was curious as well). Simultaneously, I knew that dilation isn’t on a clock—and that our bodies can (and do) open to full dilation in minutes sometimes… So I slipped back into a state of surrender. At this point I was also pretty dissociated from the fact a baby was the end result of this process because it was just so long and intense. It was around this point that I was having some honey to give me some more energy.

At some point in the latter part of birth I started bleeding—small amounts but rather consistently. We were moving chucks pads around with me to catch the blood as I went from the birth ball, to the bed, to the floor, etc. Due to the bleeding and long labour, my midwife wanted to check the heartbeat, and although I wasn’t worried for our little gal (at any point in the birth really), I was happy for her to check in—and twice we heard her strong heartbeat.

About 33 or so hours in, I was beyond exhausted. Our midwife made the call that we all needed an energetic (and literal) break and that she would go home for a quick reset, and that we should try and sleep. Just before that, my water had started to gush out more, and after she left it really was coming out.

River was able to sleep a little, but my contractions were now basically on top of one another with absolutely no rest, and that made it so intense I wasn’t even able to lie down. After waking River and suggesting that I might be dying (metaphorically, of course!), he texted our midwife saying it was likely time to head back over.

I laboured on the toilet for a little while, and this was by far the most painful part of the whole birth. I could feel her head and for the first time in the labour it really clicked that a baby was near.

River quickly warmed up the birth pool with some fresh hot water and I hobbled my way over and into it. By then our midwife had arrived and she had just tucked herself quietly out of the way—I barely realised she had come back.

Being in the pool, all of the pain went away and contractions actually slowed way down. Being on the tail end of 36 hours, that made me want to get out of the pool to speed things back up, but my midwife calmly suggested all was good and that there was no “going back” and to just enjoy the rest.

I really dropped back into my body, awaiting the next surge. River hopped in the pool too and we really locked in face to face. The last few contractions were painless—I could feel her descend and there was pressure but no “ring of fire”… really no pain. I bared down with the last contraction and she came out into the water; River helped me place her on my chest and she let out a big beautiful cry (as did we). Truly the most magical moment of our lives.

The placenta came out shortly after with gentle coaxing and we put it into our big popcorn bowl that floated in the pool. I bled enough in the pool that we couldn’t see the bottom, but I felt good, and after 20 mins or so of just settling into the new reality, River and Sinead helped me out of the pool and tucked me and baby girl into bed.

Luca (who wasn’t named yet) latched and fed for a whole hour after birth while I ate as well. River then held her while I took a little nap. I woke up to him sitting in the chair across the room with his eyes closed while Luca slept in a tiger hold so peacefully in his arms. 

She was here… she’s perfect…  she’s ours… we did it.